When you talk with people, you probably pay attention to facial expressions since they are usually indicative of human emotions, but are you reading other people’s facial expressions accurately? If not, then you are at a distinct disadvantage not only in business but also in your personal relationships, and learning to accurately interpret body language can help you succeed.
Body Language and the Six Primary Emotions
Sharon Brehm, Saul Kassin, and Steven Fein, coauthors of Social Psychology (2002), say that “in The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals (1872), Charles Darwin proposed that the face expresses emotion in ways that are innate and understood by people all over the world” (p. 97). Research has supported Darwin’s proposal.
For example, in numerous studies participants from ten different countries were presented with photos of individuals displaying six primary emotions:
- Happiness;
- Fear;
- Anger;
- Sadness;
- Surprise; and
- Disgust.
And though there is some disagreement over the strength of the studies’ results, regardless of a participant’s nationality, he or she was able to identify accurately the emotion being displayed. (Brehm, Kassin & Fein, 2002)
Body Language and the Eyes
There’s much truth in the expression “The eyes have it,” especially when it comes to interpreting another person’s interest in a proposal you’re making, something you’re trying to sell, or even in you yourself. In fact, according to Dr. David Lieberman, author of You Can Read Anyone: Never Be Fooled, Lied to, or Taken Advantage of Again (2007),”When a person is interested or aroused, the pupils dilate, letting in more light, allowing him to ‘see clearly’ and garner more information” (p. 71). If, however, a person is less than receptive to an idea, object, or another person, the pupils of his or her eyes will constrict (Lieberman, 2007).
Lieberman says there are additional indicators besides pupil size that signal someone’s interest:
- The person’s eyes will open wider;
- The person will most likely open his or her mouth, at least to a degree; and
- The person will keep his/her attention focused on the object of interest.
On the other hand, in order to interpret a person’s true motives and feelings accurately, you shouldn’t rely solely upon the eyes, but instead concentrate on the entirety of his or her facial expressions.
What a Person’s Facial Expression Is Saying
According to Gerard Nierenberg and Henry Calero, coauthors of How to Read a Person Like a Book (1993), Jane Templeton, author of “How Salesmen Can Find Out What’s Really on a Customer’s Mind,” maintains that a person’s facial expressions can reveal several things:
- If the eyes are downcast and face turned away, you’re being shut out;
- If the mouth is relaxed, smile natural and not mechanical, and chin forward, the person is probably at least considering your idea, proposal, offer, etc.;
- If the eyes engage yours for several seconds at a time and the person smiles to one side, with the smile extending at least to nose level, he or she is seriously weighing your idea, offer, or proposal, etc.; and
- If the person shifts his or her head to the same level as yours, the smile is relaxed and natural, and he or she appears enthusiastic, your idea, offer, or proposal, etc. is most likely going to be accepted.
How to Read a Person’s Smile for Sincerity
Another skill you should develop is that of interpreting a person’s smile because not all smiles are created equal and not all smiles are indicative of good will. In fact, Dr. Ewan Grant of Birmingham University, as cited by Nierenberg and Calero, maintains that people should “beware the oblong smile,” which is the type smile most people use when they feel they have to be polite (p. 22).
As Nierenberg and Calero describe this smile, “The lips are drawn back from both upper and lower teeth, forming the oblong with the lips” (p. 22). This type of smile has no depth and is really more of a grimace than an indicator of happiness or pleasure. In fact, it is the smile of a person who is “pretending to enjoy a joke or off-the-cuff remark, or a girl who is receiving “too much attention from a drunk” or “being chased around the office by the boss” (Nierenberg & Calero, p. 23).
In summary, the ability to read body language, including not only facial expressions but also body gestures, can help you succeed in all areas of your life, both professionally and personally, because you will be able to identify other people’s true feelings and know whether or not they are genuinely interested in what you have to offer, propose, or sell, including yourself.
Sources:
Brehm, S., Kassin, S. & Fein, S. (2002) Social Psychology: Fifth Edition; New York: Houghton Mifflin Company.
Fast, J. (1987) The Body Language of Sex, Power, and Aggression; Philadelphia, PA: J. B. Lippincott Company.
Lieberman, D. J. (2007) You Can Read Anyone: Never Be Fooled, Lied to, or Taken Advantage of Again; New York: MJF Books.
Nierenberg, I. N. & Calero, H. H. (1993) How to Read a Person like a Book; New York: Fall River Press.
Carol Rzadkiewicz - Carol Rzadkiewicz has taught college English for over 14 years and is the author of three published novels and numerous short stories.
